‘If you want the rainbow, you’ve got to put up with the rain. Do you know which ‘philosopher’ said that? Dolly Parton. And people say she’s just a pair of tits.’

David Brent – The Office

May 28th 2018

Bank Holiday Monday. The 20 years ago Dave would be having a nice long lie in, stumbling out of bed around lunchtime, hungover and in need of something fried and in a stottie. He would then chuck on the worst checky Ben Sherman shirt he could find, splash on the Tommy Hilfiger, and head off down the Bay (Whitley) to drink heavily for 9 hours whilst avoiding being punched by strangers. Ah, glory days. 2018 Dave is up at 6:30am, as his ageing bladder doesn’t allow any longer, and off out for an 8 mile run. He doesn’t drink for 9 hours, but he does avoid being punched by strangers.

May 29th 2018

Back at work after the long weekend and, regardless of whether you love your job or not, it’s all a bit meh. After yesterday’s bonus Weekday longish Run I’m already ahead for the week so jump on the treadmill for 2 miles.

May 30th 2018

Reminded that I’ve agreed to take part in the Office Quiz tomorrow. This is an annual gathering that involves being piled with free alcohol and being asked lots of questions, much like a usual Monday in the House of Commons. You can witness some unexpected rabid competitiveness from usual shrinking violets, which always has a great entertainment value attached to it. Therefore decide to jump on treadmill for a short 2 miler and get up early in the morning for a longer outside one.

May 31st 2018

Its Office Quiz day. As I’m going to be drinking later on whilst trying to remember who finished second in this years Eurovision, I get out for an early run. Dragging my arse out of bed for 5:30am, I complete a fairly regular 4.3 mile loop that takes in the sea front. It’s pretty quick for someone half asleep, averaging 8:06 minute miles. Go me. At work decide to carb up at lunch time in the local bar. Have you ever asked a 20 year old buxom waitress old enough to be your daughter for a double fisted burger? It’s awkward. To the Office Quiz and I’m on a decent team. When I say decent, I mean people who are also there to drink heavily and have no interest in winning. Despite putting ‘One of the Kardashians’ on any answer we were stuck on, we manage to finish second and only lose out by a point. I pop to The Strawberry ‘for one’ afterwards but end up staying till last orders. There won’t be an early run tomorrow.

June 2nd 2018

I don’t run on the Friday due to being ‘tired’ from the Office Quiz. Saturday is my wedding anniversary and I celebrate by getting up for a 5.3 mile circular which again takes in the sea front. There’s even a cheeky fast 24:32 5k in there. I take the family back to Blackpool for the weekend, this time not to run but to visit the Zoo. We see lots of great things, including a Gorilla picking at his todger. Who says romance is dead.

Total miles run: 21.7