2022

The 2022 Christmas Special

notbuilttorun, , , , Leave a comment

‘He’s a kid. Kids are stupid. I know I was.’

Marv, Home Alone

With any luck, it’s Christmas Eve, you’ve settled down with a nice cup of hot chocolate in front of a roaring open fire, and you’re thinking ‘what shit is this clown coming up with now.’ I’ll take it as a compliment, really.

The last two Christmas Specials have been pretty negative in tone – ie hasn’t the past year been an absolute shit show. This year though, we can be far more positive. I mean, apart from a War in Ukraine, an Energy Crisis, the Cost of Living, pretty much a General Strike, and a hugely incompetant Government, it’s been ok hasn’t it?

On a personal and running note, it’s been a mixed bag for me, as you’ll see from the list below. I’ve had my first injury free year since 2015, but was disappointed with the performances in both my Half Marathons. This prompted me to finally hit peak hypocrisy, by joining my local Running Club, which turned out to be one of the best things I’ve ever done. My fitness levels are up, my pace is quicker, and I’ve given myself that extra bit of motivation you always need during those hard Winter months of crap weather and short days.

I got a new job, which has eliminated my commute and given me more of a running window, which in turn has helped piss my family off less (runners know what I mean). It’s also given me more time to get back into Yoga which I have, big style. As well as doing one Virtual session a week, I also get in 3 or 4 shorter ones now. Namaste motherfuckers. 

As always, at the start of the year I set myself some goals. So, drum roll please..

2022 GOALS (AND HOW THEY WENT)

Update the notbuilttorun website a lot more – 7 posts this year. That’s like 1 a month. Sort of. It’s one more than last year. I’ve also spread them out much better this year rather than front/back ending as I have done in the past. Look, I’mtrying my best ok, WHY ARE YOU JUDGING ME? I’ve also had more hits to the site since I launched it in the 2018 pre-fuckwit dystrophia world we now live in. I’m huge in Ecuador. 

Run Every Day (RED) in January – Nailed it like a Messiah to the cross. It is getting harder though, as I get older and creakier. A quick look at my Strava in January (I need to look back to check, I can’t even remember what I had for tea yesterday) shows a lot of Treadmill runs and only two weekend long runs. Basically, it looks like the weather was a bastard and I mostly took cover indoors on the travelator blasting Eternal’s Greatest Hits. God I loved Louise.

Run 1,000 miles – I’m on a roll here. As I write this, I sit on 1,236 miles for the year. I’ll fall just shy of 1,300 by the time the year ends, but should hopefully pass my biggest ever total of 1,257. Although, the snow and ice might have a say in thatfinal total. Piss off Winter!

Get a PB – PBs? Aren’t they the kind of things new runners and young people get? As predicted, I haven’t had any milestone distance PBs. The days of getting faster 5k and 10ks are over. However, due to the quick sessions at the aforementioned Club training nights I have been getting a surge of Strava Segment PBs over the last 3 months. It’sbecause the swine’s make me run fast!

Run a Half Marathon – Now this one is complicated. I did achieve this – I ran two – but they were both piss poor. Firstlyin May I ran the Sunderland Half and wasn’t happy with it. My arse dropped out in the last couple of miles. I had a shitter. Fast forward to the Great North Run in September and the same story. Arse. Shitter. As I mentioned in the intro above, this was the catalyst for joining the Running Club. Stop being shit at Half Marathons. I need to fall back in love with it again in 2023.

Run longer than 13.1 miles – Every year I put this in, every year I fail to do anything about it. I don’t even have injury or time as an excuse this year. It will go on my 2023 Goals as well. Next year I have a feeling though. Just see.

300 miles on Zwift – Oh dear. I wrote a piece earlier in the year about how I’d fallen out with Zwift. The RunPod was forever dropping out, and no amount or battery change, calibration, or standing on my head was helping. I then turned my Treadmill room (don’t you all have one of those?) into an Office to work from home so there was no space for my makeshift-box-with-the-ipad-on that I was using to run Zwift. In October, I decided to give it another go, with the ‘genius’ idea of blutacking the iPad to the Treadmill. This worked a treat…until the 4th time when it came crashing off. Pondering my next move to be honest.

Run on Holiday – I sort of went on holiday, and I sort of didn’t. Not abroad anyway, but I did pop off to Shropshire to stay with my wife’s family. I go there every year and I run there every year. It’s Hell. I keep meaning to write a post about it. It’s like a Boot Camp, the place is just a collection of hills from which there is no escape. However, it doesn’t half do me the world of good. 

Remain in Employment – I know I always say I’m staying away from politics but lets be honest, the UK is a bit of a shit show at the minute isn’t it? Therefore I continue to prayer and worship all Deities, Gods, and Cults that I remain able to pay the bills and provide for the family. In 2022 I not only managed to remain in Employment, I also allowed myself to be poached like a footballer to go and signed for a bigger rival. So far, so good. In fact, it’s going too well. It’s a trap.

Avoid catching/passing on COVID – When we think COVID visited Casa Notbuilttorun way back in 2020 (before Tests), everyone was ill except me. I felt fine. Apart from one thing – for a week I had painful chilblains on my toes. I’ve never suffered from chilblains. In November I got a little cold, and then for a couple of weeks after I got really painful chilblains on my fingers. So this was probably a fail.

So, a year of change but the most normal year we’ve had since 2019. Scary isn’t it. Who knows what 2023 has in store for us. The way things are going, Nuclear War and the Hunger Games. Christ, this is cheerful. 

As always, I wish you all a stress-free Christmas and New Year and hope your running year has been positive and enjoyable – whatever your pace, distance, or goals.

Right. I’m off to make a start on the Pringles. 

Merry Christmas!

The Running Man

notbuilttorun, , 2 Comments

– He wasn’t very old.

– No, he was pretty old. He was 41.

– Oh yeah? Oh, that’s old.

David and Jennifer, Wargames

It’s a great film, Wargames, if you haven’t seen it. It’s about a young High School kid who manages to hack into the US Defence system and accidently nearly start World War III. That’s an amazing feat when you look at the archaic hunk of shite home computer he’s using. More technology in a phone these days. I know I’m not really selling this well, but it’s got Ally Sheedy in it and we all need lots of Ally Sheedy.

Get on with it. Ok, there was a point. I loved this film as a kid, and apart from the accidently declaring Nuclear War on the Russians, it’s really a film about the young flicking their Vs up at the set-in-their-ways-think-they-know-best older generation. I used to laugh at that line about 41, but in a ‘yeah, what a bunch of old twats’ kind of way.

And now I’m 41.

And I think the 2020s 41 is very different to the 1980s 41. My Mam had a perm at 41 that made her look about 60. I think most people’s Mams in the 80s did. 41 is no longer ‘old’. They used to say life begins at 40. Try saying that to my Grandad who’d been down a pit for 20 odd years by that point, and only lived another 20 years. I don’t think the phrase has ever really been true until the last couple of decades. There are so many opportunities to be healthier, exercise, and live longer. Although, I’ve told my wife that if I’m proper knackered just unplug me.

So, 41 isn’t old. I love you Ally Sheedy and I always will. Maybe not as much as Phillpa Forrester, but you’re still wrong. Therefore, this 41 year olds goals are…

2022 Goals

  • Update the notbuilttorun website a lot more – Haha, unlucky suckers. I’ve noticed though, I tend to go through a flurry of updates at the very start of the year and then the very end. So really, update it more consistently.
  • Run Every Day (RED) in January – We’re not as lockdown tastic as we were last year, so life might get in the way. However, I’m currently 14 days in and apart from my grumbling Achilles (standard) we’re well on track. Until said Achilles pings.
  • Run 1,000 miles – 3 years running I’ve hit this, the last year with 200 miles in change. As long as I avoid injury and illness, I should hopefully hit this again. At my current rate, I’m projected 1,144 which I’d take all day long and then some.
  • Get a PB – I didn’t get any ‘outside’ PBs last year, but still managed some Zwift/Treadmill ones. My find the need for speed on the Treadmill and get some inny ones. I’m also counting Strava Segment PBs, so surely there will be one in there somewhere? (Spoiler Alert – I’ve hit some in the first 14 days)
  • Run a Half Marathon – Of course I’m in the GNR September, Number 11, and it’s back to it’s original course. As an aside, if it is back to it’s usual format, this will be the moment I decide life is back to ‘normal’. The Sunderland Half is on the 8th May. It’s tempting.
  • Run longer than 13.1 miles – I tried this last year, I didn’t do it. There is no fail, only try. I failed to try though. The goal is still to get to 16 miles by the end of the year. My thought is to attempt it after one of my Halfs, while I’m still in ‘the Zone’. Whatever zone that might be.
  • 300 miles on Zwift- Ah Zwift. I’m not sick of it. Yet. March to Dec 2021 I logged around 300 miles. That seems like a good and achievable number to aim for. We like achievable stuff, it brings balance to the force caused by the probable failure of the goal above..
  • Run on Holiday – I’m supposed to be in sunny Menorca in May, a holiday now 2 years overdue cos of some global pandemic or something. Like a sad sack, I’m taking my gear for a bit of Balearic sea breeze and beer sweating.
  • Remain in Employment – People to feed, bills to pay, trainers to buy.
  • Avoid catching/passing on COVID – Get super boosted. Wear a mask rat lickers.

Piece. Of. Piss.

I hope everyone’s 2022, running or personal, goes as planned. Or a good unplanned at least.

Remember, 41 isn’t that old. But if you see me in a nightclub at 2am, you have permission to shoot me.